Before Christmas we posted a report from our intrepid scribe Andreas Bowlus in Outer Bramhope – on the ominous stirrings up the A660 and the iniquities of the CoEmperors PickloGovus.
Now, from Darkest Adel and Wharfedale, come despatches from Cambodunum [aka Roman Adel] brought to you at considerable risk by our fearless team of Red Carrier Pigeons.
There are rumours of dastardly conspiracies by the tribe of Historians – who have been rewriting the history of our Empire and its Great Wars.
There are fears that this may be fostering a slave revolt, under the leadership of one Baldricus [though a figure – known to the initiated by the codename of Al-x S -b-l – is emerging as its local spearhead].
Co-Emperor M.Govus, in a recent interview on the B[ramhope] B[roadcasting] C[ompany], confronted these enemies.
He will, it is thought, write his own version of history.
In the meantime, he has changed his name, by edict, to Horatio – protector against the invading hordes.
He may personally defend the bridge at Otley, aided by his great ally, Gregorius M-lh-l-d, from the Pink Painted People of Leeds NW.
Meanwhile, his Co-Emperor, E Picklio, is once again at odds with his provincial governors here in Loidis.
Secret inscriptions, found among the Twitterings, show he is planning yet more clampdowns on local finance. Together with his sidekick, G Shappsius – a sinister figure widely believed to fly by night in his private plane from a specially protected airfield – Picklio is now squaring up to all his provincial governors. He accuses them of being ‘democracy dodgers’, for holding their tax rises just below his 2% threshold.
The Pink Painted People take this ill, and point out that, unlike E Picklio, they are elected every year – and on the manifesto they intend to implement.
But the autocrat knows no shame.
Last year the PPP of Loidis managed to keep their rises down – by means of a cunning plan. This year the 2% rise may be reached, and Picklio’s axe will fall on them again.
But whatever, Picklio’s wrath against the Pink Painted People– especially in the Northern Provinces – know no bounds.
They will all be clobbered anyway.
Revolt and rumours of revolt continue to abound.
Our pigeons are tweeting. . .
Follow them on Twitter @AdelWharfLabour and @LeedsNWLabour
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